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You are always on my mind

Dear Marshall,

I will be going back into the hospital for a colostomy reversal in a few days. I will be there for about 5 days, hopefully less! Your Grandma and Grandpa will be coming to keep you company. They are the best.

I think what I want to say to you is I am scared, but I am excited too. I want to move forward from some of the big stuff our family has gone through. Although I will have health concerns throughout my life, this is just our reality. I feel strong and again I pull a lot of my strength from you.

Its important to me that you know, life is not always going to be easy. You will experience difficult times. But I don't want you to wallow in the deep end. Life is beautiful. I believe there is a silver lining to many of our hardships. I want you to find those silver linings. They will pull you out of some of the darkest holes.

Also know, its ok to feel scared, or worried, or have a flood of emotions in life. Men are allowed to have emotions. You don't have to play strong. Work through your emotions. Feel them, acknowledge them, and let them go.

You will be on my mind, as you always are. You live in my heart forever my boy.

Love mom.

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